While I have to say that banks are probably not a leading cause of rape, they are , in fact, a cause, especially among the indebted. For years banks have been using this as a means of intimidation and debt collection, and it's time for it to stop. These guys will help you out by telling you if you are on any banks rape-list. No, rape is not in any way funny, and that's why I am being dead serious here. They only rape guys, does that make it funnier?

Who reads magazines anymore? Old people, that's who, and they hate us. Old people consider everybody foul, evil and worthless, yes, even your grandma secretly hates you. How do you get the drop on them? You read what they read. But, you ask, if they know that we are onto them won't they change how they get their information? Good point. That's why these guy started their service. Old people cannot use computers, so they put magazines on computers so that now old people will never know that we can watch their every move.

You ever notice that nothing really interesting ever happens around you? Well I am here to point you to the first thing ever to happen in your life that could have been straight out of a Stephen King short story, and not any of the recent boring trying-too-hard-ones either, but the old strung-out pervert King. If you are smart you will pay close attention to this blog and tell only your closest friends about it. There is some mystical shit going on here at colfax.webnode.com and it should only be shared with people you care about. I am not a traffic-whore or anything like that so don't go telling everybody and writing my URL in the ladies rest-room or anything.

Now to the website in question (see below). They back all kinds of shit up. Including your life. You kill a hooker by accident again? They can return your life to the point just before you did it, no more remorse, no more shame or pain no more having to leave crippled people laying in the street at 3AM where you hit them. Buy their service and you will have back-up for your life.

Famous for making clever, and witty Superbowl ads, I found out truth about this hosts via some top-secret messageboards that I visit that you all don't know about (I am l33t, motherfuckers, l33t!), and the truth is that this whole gigantic domain retail thing is just a cover for a gang of global assassins that hire themselves out only to l33t Internet geeks like myself. You have to put in the right coupon code when purchasing a domain to get the page where you put in the name of the target and your credit card number (they have a sale on right now where you can get 3 people killed for US$300!). Anyway, I will be happy to tell you how to become as l33t as me. Keep checking back for details.

Well, when I first got these guys' service I thought all they would do was host my website, but there's more to their service than that. If you are a couple desperately trying to conceive a child they will come to your house and impregnate your wife for you. Yes, they are full-service like that. They don't care what she looks like either. If she is physically able to conceive they will come over and fuck her. I cannot guarantee the quality of the servicing, I can, however guarantee that they will get the job done. My wife is not the proud mother of a pair of half-Indian looking twins named Sherbish and Gabeej!